July 28, 2017, 7:32 AM. Friday. The sound of falling rain.
It has been a season of heat for as long as I could remember. Irritated days and disgusting heat rashes are finally now over and I could spend my sleep in peace.
When I look back, I realized I had the longest summer of my life. Four whole months instead of the normal 2 months. Maybe this is because I never had the chance to experience summer anymore? Ever since work, summer became those sweaty and dry days going back and forth to work, while occasionally trying to squeeze short weekend swimming trips.
the suppressed adult level of fun.
Everything is fine, every once in a while. Though, when does once in a while even occur? If I am fatigued, when can it ever end? That’s the never ending process I couldn’t. Until finally, I took a heavy blow to the head.
I have no choice but to deconstruct everything. Like a finished game of Jenga, it’s time to build anew!
Everything is a learning process. At least, I know I’m not wasting my summer being lazy.
My first act for the summer is to step away from the country. Very very far away! I’m talking about my trip to Hong Kong. The real night life in the city, beautiful people of different colors, the physical embodiment of Walt Disney’s dream, it’s not a dream come true but a dream I wouldn’t want to end.
Believe it or not, I was not allowed by the company to take that vacation. It was holding me back greatly. In fact, it took a hold of us on our necks as if we were like puppies on a leash.
The bold risk was like a deep dive towards an unclear road, but the truth is, it made life clearer to me. If we were to stay in one place, like perhaps in one company or one country, then we will never know the great leaps outside the bubble. A clear vision will only come until we remove the bonds that hold us.
On several occasions, I spent days with my relatives in Pampanga during the summer. So long I have been looking for the perfect time to enjoy a summer with them. A decade has been since my first long summer vacations and there’s never a year where my presence wasn’t there. It’s crazy that now we’ve all developed from our child minds, we wonder what exactly made me obsessed with staying with them? I and my cousin ask particularly.
When I look back I see those days and nights where all we did was play games. Moments where we sneak out of beds just to watch downstairs. Those moments when we used to fuss over java games and Ne-Yo on our Nokia phones. Days of driving through Clark and buying those large chocolate bars. Nights when we hid upstairs and laugh about the chants we hear whenever there’s a prayer meeting downstairs. We were so mean, I realized.
That’s it? Those spectacular little moments made me obsessed? Everything is so different now. Now, we have shifted focus on all sorts of things. I, myself, am guilty of focusing on work and writing. My cousins, getting into relationships and focusing on early career choices. I can’t blame myself and I definitely can’t blame them, too. Perhaps, they’re the answer to the question. That I am obsessed with them now because I want to go back to those carefree days that we just laugh about everything. However, no matter how much I spend time with them, the hard truth is that the past cannot be replicated. That’s why we have to enjoy every single moment of the present.
At least, we still do make new happy moments. There should be no point in time that age should be a construct of depression. As long as we’re together, we’re going to have fun.
One of the best things about the summer was that I could get to travel alone. Sure, for some people that’s not a huge deal but I’m happy that I was able to do so. Inside the heart of Manila, I was able to discover the hidden gems. It’s like digging for gold. You don’t know what’s under the dirt until you dig and dig deep down. I learned of those benefits yet the real benefit is finding my inner peace. You can never truly appreciate life until you know how to find yourself in the process.
With that, I learned I have more creative when seeing sceneries and at the same time more efficient when working outdoors in quiet areas. I’ve confirmed to be a real introvert since I prefer solitude over the usual crowd at home. It’s the state of grace that’s highly a self-need. There comes a time in a person’s life where he has to define and know himself. Trying crazy things in the past, I know my true nature is at peaceful outdoors with a cup of coffee.
Just because I’m jobless, that doesn’t mean I’m not doing anything with my life. Of course, there’s traveling, there’s gaming, and also being able to enjoy the benefits of sleeping complete hours, but the screws have unfastened. No longer am I in a box but a free spirit. I’m not saying I could do everything I want but saying that I have understood life well. Jobs became a central part of life for many individuals and it’s silly because it’s not. We have families and ourselves to take care of, and most of all we have to experience the world and our own creativity.
I did have some hard times. Shifting industries to follow my career was a tough process! I had so many moments of financial stress and times where I thought I’d end up being a bagger for a grocery store. Unlucky or tensed during interviews only grew my dark side. This is when I decided to work twice as hard.
Did it work? Significantly, it did! Photography and blogging-wise, there’s been a positive rise. Being more “keen” to details and giving time to learn has been helpful. The best thing of all is that I was able to find a job that suits me! I’m now editing essays from the comfort of my home or any place I may find solitude. A good start for my career! My Saturday classes have always classes so it’s going to be different from now on. It took time but God blessed me with righteous wisdom and phenomenon.
July 28, 2017, 7:37 AM. Friday. Reflecting over summer on a rainy day.
It’s been an amazing 4 months of summer. A lot of great things happened that I didn’t include here but here are the worthy ones. It’s time to start this new life. I guess this is just another life update but at least I’ve learned much from the 4 months. Under the sound of falling rain, it’s time to have a cup of tea and enjoy writing.